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Domestic Abuse

Domestic Abuse can be one or a combination of the feelings and experiences we mention below.

The list could go on and on. What matters is your health, safety and how you feel about yourself.

If you have children, what impact is the abusive relationship having on them.

Threats, name calling or criticism may have left you feeling worthless and embarrassed.

The confidence you once had may have been taken from you and has been replaced with confusion, loneliness, anxiety and feelings of helplessness.

You may feel trapped by the fear of losing your children, your home and your place in the community or expelled from this country.

Thoughts of your family, friends, work colleagues being threatened or being told stories about you frightens you into silence.

The fear for your pets, your private life being made public or not being believed dwells heavily on your shoulders affecting your health and well being.

You may fear or have experienced the pain and humiliation of physical and / or degrading sexual violence or coercion.
Your sexuality, race, culture, faith, age or ability may be used against you.  

Making excuses and taking the blame or responsibility for your partner’s behaviour takes the pressure off. But only till the next time. Even when you try harder to make the relationship work and do everything you can to please you are still blamed for getting it wrong.

The way you are feeling is a direct result of how you have been treated by your partner or ex partner..
You are not weak, or stupid, or a failure, or a nag, or a hopeless mum, cook, wife or partner. You are not a burden, a hopeless driver, organiser, worker or home maker.

It is not because you are too intelligent, unintelligent, lazy, a perfectionist, socially unacceptable or unlovable or any of the other negative threats or name calling which you have been forced to listen to.

You are abused.

The person you share or shared your life with feels they have the right to make you feel this way. They believe it is acceptable to control your thoughts and actions by using emotional, financial and or physical / sexual force.

They are wrong. The laws of Scotland state clearly that they are wrong. Your human rights are being taken from you.
You and your children (if any) have the right to live free from fear, abuse and violence.

At any time of the day or night you can contact The Scottish Domestic Abuse Helpline.

Someone who cares for you is already there and waiting.   0800 027 1234
Calls are confidential and free from landlines.

Click here to find out how abuse effects children
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